Random Gripes from Panama

After spending 3 weeks in Panama, there are a few things that have been bugging me. I have never known myself to be a 'complain king' but hey, everyone has a moment of weakness right? So here are some random gripes I have.

Firstly, why is it that practically every Singaporean Chinese above the age of 30 that I know MUST eat Chinese food when they are in a foreign land? For Christ sake, why travel thousands of miles, just to eat in a dumbass Chinese restaurant? In my opinion, you can eat all the freaking Chinese food that you want when you get back to Singapore. In the meantime, when you're in friggin' Panama/Germany/England/Democratic Republic of Congo, I'll suggest you eat Panamanian/German/Fish & Chips/Democratic Republic of Congolease food! I have the unfortunate task of sharing my meals with 2 old geezers, who have a 'preference' for Chinese food. I guess I'll just have to bare with it for now. OK, thats all for random gripe number 1.

Secondly, how many of you have gone to a Chinese restaurant in a Western country? And how many of you ordered fried rice served on a plate? And how many of you were given a pair of chopsticks and spoon? Holy shite! What the hell are you going to do with the chopsticks? Are you suppose to pick the grain of rice from the plate and eat it? A plate?!?!?! Chopsticks?!?! Nuts...

"Gee Jack, I wonder how those Chinese eat with these sticks?"

"Shush Peter, we're using them so that we can get a more oriental feel, now pass me that grain of rice on your plate will you?"

And then, there is the other extreme. You order fried rice, they give you a fork and a knife. Ok, fork I can understand, cause in most western culture, you eat the rice with the fork right? But the knife? What am I suppose to do with it? Stab the retarded waiter who gave me the cutlery? Or try to cut the rice into smaller grains so that I won't choke on them?

Random gripe number 3. Boy, am I on a roll today. What is it with smokers? You waste 10 minutes smoking before a meal. After the meal, you waste another 10 minute smoking. Then before you leave the office, you smoke again. Every time you leave a place, you smoke. When you just reached a place, you smoke. Damn, I can't understand this. Is this the same theory as me pissing? I piss before and after a meal. I piss before I leave a place/when I reach another place. Hmmmm.... Come to think of it, yeah, its pretty much the same. But pissing is free and I won't get lung cancer if I piss too much...